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Within the garden soil of our heart are many seeds—some not yet sprouted and others partially grown. Sometimes, in a particular season of life, we receive a spiritual revelation that opens our understanding as one specific seed sprouts or matures.

The Christmas season often reminds us of past times with family and loved ones, some pleasant and some painful. I often remember the Christmas in 1975 when our family of four was finally back together after being separated for weeks as a result of our involvement in the first fatality wreck of Thanksgiving that year.

The following is my description of such an awakening in my book Tracing God’s Hand, published early in 2023.

I tried so hard to recapture a normal Christmas, but there still seemed to be something missing for me—what was it? I couldn’t put my finger on it—whatever it was.

A few days after Christmas, Monty was resting while the boys played outside and the house was quiet. I was picking up around the house when I noticed a ray of sunlight coming through the front picture window. It caused a small tree ornament on the floor to sparkle. As I stepped into that ray of light to scoop up the ornament, the sun streaming through the window reflected off the shiny metal. I paused and studied it with its small metal cut-out shapes of Mary, Joseph, and baby. It nestled in my hand as I savored the warm Texas sun spilling through the window. Basking in that warmth, I thought of all the ways God had been going before us, day after day, and all the ways He had repeatedly shown me His love and provisions.

I felt as I imagine a seed feels in the sun’s warming light when all the potential genetic information stored inside it begins to direct it upward and skyward in response to the sunlight. Its tender shoots and leaves dance in the warmth of the sunlight calling them to bud and bloom in the warm and welcoming rays. I was not only soaking in sunlight, but also S-o-n-light.

 The individual facts from my years of reading scripture and hearing it taught were swirling together into one powerful truth surging through me. This bud was swelling and bursting forth into a deeper comprehension that was giving me exuberant joy. 

I fondled the ornament and thought about how the same God who created the sun warming my skin, loved me so much He provided a way to restore fellowship with him. And the baby on this ornament represented His Son, Jesus Christ. This long-awaited God-wrapped-in-human-form-baby was the Messiah promised thousands of years before he arrived in Bethlehem. He physically came to earth to show God’s great love. He died for us to return us to fellowship with God. He rose from the dead—and now lives forever.

I placed the small nativity ornament back on the tree as my spirit soared to new heights. I serve a risen Savior who’s truly alive and loves me! He really … actually … loves me!

Hope and joy flooded my soul! Whatever had caused my unsettled feeling earlier was gone. In His infinite wisdom, God knew I needed this extra affirmation. Somehow, during that moment in the sunlight: Christmas, Good Friday, and Easter merged into one glorious understanding. Perhaps it had something to do with coming face to face with the fragility of human life and staring death in the face. But, now I knew—beyond a shadow of a doubt—my joy, hope, and confidence are in relying on the one true God. And He has already demonstrated that He can raise the dead. My hope is in a risen Savior who has repeatedly shown me tangibly that—He IS with me and … not only is He NOT silent, but He knows me and loves me and promises His followers eternal life.

During the weeks following the wreck, God showed me love in ways I had never thought about before. His love flows from an immense compassion that a human can never match. Now I realized, God was there even when I felt alone—he never deserted me—even when my circumstances were scary and painful. I personally learned the same lesson Peter learned when Jesus asked him to step out of the boat and walk on the water: You have to keep your eyes on the Lord and NOT your physical circumstances if you’re going to survive and thrive. (1)

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I’m a slow learner. However, I have learned that anxiety and fear must not rule when trusting God and His perfect love. (Remember how young David found that giant-killing stone?) Sometimes I personalize Proverbs 3:5 to remind me of this lesson: “Trust Me with all your heart, Phyllis (or your name), and don’t judge or lean only on your own understanding of the situation.”

May you have a Blessed and Merry Christmas as we celebrate how the Word (God) became flesh and dwelt among us! (John 1:14)

Phyllis.

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1. Kester, Phyllis. Tracing God’s Hand. (Littleton CO: Illumify Media Global, 2023), pp. 102-105.