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Grandma’s Important Legacy
Tuesday, December 6, 2022 by Phyllis Kester
Grandma Nora Mae Chumney Hays with seven children in birth order
“Mom, you’re always talking about your Grandma Hays. What’s the most important legacy you received from her?”
Hmm-m, I guess it would be hearing her pray every day—and then living long enough to see her prayers answered, even the specific ones about her own death. Everyone in the family knew how God answered her prayers.
When the hospital sent Uncle Dallas home to die, she prayed daily for months, and he recovered—much to the doctor’s shock.
My Uncle Daniel, her youngest son, was on a ship in the middle of the fighting during World War II. I heard her prayers asking God to let her live long enough to see him safe at home. That’s exactly how it happened. After he returned and was safe at home, I heard her pray several times that she was ready to go home to be with the Lord if God was finished with her here on earth. She would pray, ‘Just reach down and take me. Lord. Don’t let me be a burden on anyone.’ Her death was instantaneous—just like she prayed—after I started school and no longer needed her to care for me during the day while mother worked.
All my life I heard family members relate stories of Grandma’s answered prayers. For example, before my mother could crawl or walk Grandma had tied a dishtowel around her to hold her upright in a rocking chair in front of their fireplace. Mother could make the chair rock by moving her head forward and backward. Somehow the chair rocked so big it tipped over … tossing her face down into the burning fire and burying her left hand in the hot coal bed. Her clothes and hair caught on fire. She was burned bad. Grandma cried and prayed as she put the fire out and tried to clean up her baby girl. Mother’s brothers told me they were all terrified their baby sister would die.
“Good grief! They did call an ambulance or get a doctor, didn’t they?!”
No, Honey. There weren’t any doctors in rural Oklahoma where they lived. When Grandma and her husband moved there from Tennessee, that part of the country was called Indian Territory. It became the state of Oklahoma a few years before Mother’s birth in 1912 You’ve got to remember that Grandma Hays was poor, had no phone, lived out in the country, and didn’t have transportation like we do now. Her husband died shortly after their seventh child was born, so she raised five boys and two girls by depending on prayer and trusting God. She’s an example of how God is like a husband to the widow.
In the particular case of my Mother’s burns, an elderly preacher heard what happened and came to their house. He prayed for God to protect Mom’s face from scarring since disfigurement is devastating to any child, and especially if it’s on the face of a girl.
“Oh, my gosh, I remember. She doesn’t have any scars on her face!”
“No.”
“Did the fire cause her deformed left hand?”
“Yes. Can you imagine a baby’s tender little hand buried in hot coals!”
“That’s awful!”
“The last joints in her two smallest fingers melted into her palm and the middle finger never could straighten. Like many ladies of her era in the South, she usually carried a pretty handkerchief in her left hand. The small space under the curled middle finger held her hankies. She told me God gave her her own special handkerchief holder because once she poked one into her half closed hand, she hardly ever dropped it even if she waved that hand in the air.”
“Interesting, Mom. But why did you say hearing your grandma’s prayers and seeing them answered was the most important legacy she left you?”
“Because … Grandma Hays lived with us several years and demonstrated a steadfast hope and confidence in the sovereign Lord that I’ve seldom seen. Several times a day when I’d hear her praying, I’d slip into the room to listen and watch …”
“Watch?!”
“Yes, I’d watch the door to see her answer come …”
“You’ve got to be kidding, Mom.”
“I’m not! I became accustomed to seeing many of her prayers answered quickly. Although I wasn’t a Christian at that point in my life, I sensed she had some special relationship with the Creator of the universe who controlled everything. I wanted to stay close … with eyes wide open so I wouldn’t miss anything. I spent hours playing at her feet while she read the Bible, sometimes aloud to me, even though I didn’t really understand. After she died, the family let me have her last Bible. The corners and edges of the pages are worn off from use. Reading her Bible and praying were as natural a part of her day as eating and breathing are to us. I listened to her trusting prayers, even when things appeared impossible. Her example has encouraged me when I’ve found myself praying in difficult situations, such as when your brother got into drugs and left home or in 1975 when we thought your daddy might die after our car wreck.”
“Hmm-m … I know how those turned out. God answers your prayers, too. But, Mom, your Grandma Hays died in the mid-1940s when you were in elementary school. I don’t understand why the memory of her prayers encourages you now? That was years ago!”
“That’s easy. Her prayers taught me about God and that He’s personal. The Lord God is not some far-off indifferent force. He shows love, and He communicates with us through the Bible and through our prayer and quiet times. Watching her showed me that when you personally know the Lord God and walk close to Him, answered prayer is as natural as breathing, and it affects eternity. I had the privilege of knowing her the last six years of her life after a lifetime of trials and suffering had strengthened her faith. Seeing her live such a consistent life of faith every day, in spite of her circumstances, was a wonderful heritage—not just for me, but her seven children too. I’ve heard them say that no matter how far they strayed, they could never get away from the example of their mother. All their lives they watched her obedient, joyful walk with the Lord Jesus.”
“Okay, Mom, let’s see if I understand you. Are you saying her answered prayers and consistent walk with the Lord gave you the personal legacy of understanding that God exists, and is trustworthy, loving, personal, and big enough to be the ultimate power over the whole universe?”
“There you go—sounding like the Ph.D. you are. I have to admit, I never thought of it quite like that, but you’re right.”
“Good. Now that you’ve answered my first question, there’s another thing I don’t understand. It’s not like your grandma was the only Christian you knew; your parents were also believers. So why do you talk so much about Grandma Hays?”
“I guess because I spent most of my preschool years with her and it was a relaxed, happy time. I spent one lovely summer with my other grandparents on their farm and I couldn’t wish for more wonderful, loving Christian grandparents or parents. However, I had a greater quantity of time with Grandma Hays than all the rest during my preschool years. Hence, she left a stronger imprint that the wonderful quality time I had with my parents on weekends, during the summers, and in the evenings after they got off work. Don’t forget, Grandma had already raised a family of seven. She had a lifetime of wisdom and experience to pour into my preschool years. You probably don’t know this, Honey, but my mother wanted me to be a very independent ‘woman’s lib’ type gal who never submitted to anyone—and I was pretty much like that when I married your daddy.”
“Are you serious?”
“Yes, my mother lived to be 85 and always worked diligently to undo some of the things I had learned from her mother in that six years—and I tried some of mother’s ideas for awhile, but they never quite ‘took’ because they didn’t satisfy me. My mother’s powerful influence the rest of my life never overcame the short time I shadowed Grandma Hays. Of course, the Lord had a lot to do with the direction He wanted me to go.”
“Did I hear you right? Are you saying you think you talk about your grandma so much because you spent a large amount of time with her during your formative preschool years?”
“Yes, I have no other explanation. Even now, when I think of my childhood, it’s often my Grandma Hays who comes to mind—even though we only had my first six years together. She never seemed depressed or fearful, but always full of joy in the Lord and with a smile for everyone. Her example confirmed the trustworthiness of a personal, caring God I can call Father … and that’s priceless. Why wouldn’t I talk about her?”
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